So this week was a little rough

My wife was in Colorado for six days at a paralympic camp, our roommate spent most of the week at his girlfriend’s and later at drill. So for the majority of that time, it was just me, my brain and the animals. I didn’t have to leave the house very often, but my anxiety was still running high.

I think we all have weeks like this one: where you feel like you’re standing in the middle of an empty field (or a crowded train station), waiting for a phone call (or a smoke signal) that never arrives. When you’re an unmedicated clincial depressive, it’s very easy for these feelings to escalate. It can get pretty bleak. And that’s when you need your productive distractions the most.

My distraction for this week ended up being sci-fi: I watched 2001: A Space Odyssey and 2010: The Year We Make Contact . I’ve always loved 2001 and I found it oddly soothing this time around. I’m not sure why — I don’t think it’s the classical music soundtrack (considering another Kubrick masterpiece, A Clockwork Orange, which has a classical music soundtrack and, in the right context, can induce an anxiety attack). It could be because the narrative unfolds at a comfortable pace, without pulling out the stand-bys a lot of films resort to to hold the audience’s attention: loud noise, extreme acting, distracting narration (all of which 2010 picked up again, but the story itself was still enjoyable).

It could also be because the film encourages a kind of viewing experience where it’s meant to be just you and your brain. And, because your brain is distracted piecing together the narrative, it becomes a safer place to be.

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~ by blackmoodcraft on March 21, 2011.

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